Blogger Gets All Patriotic & Whatnot for Memorial Day



Photo Credit: Top Reader and
Gifted iPhone Photographer Katherine. 
WBD Norman enjoys a river sunset. 
Other hobbies include collecting ticks and
barking his brains out.



This Bookworm, Andrew and World’s Best Dog Norman enjoyed a lovely three day weekend with friends at the Rappahannock River.  Friends ranged from Top Blog Reader and Head of the Unofficial Word of Mouth Campaign Katherine to Oh You Are Still Doing That Blog How Cute Jed and Kristen.  Nevertheless we had a wonderful weekend swimming in the river, drinking beers and in Norman’s case, collecting ticks.

So what better way to enjoy a patriotic holiday weekend than finishing the 475 page tome In the Garden of Beasts: Love, Terror, and an American Family in Hitler's Berlin by Erik Larson?  There is really no better way to relax than reading about the American Ambassador to Germany’s time in Berlin from 1933 – 1937.  Apparently nobody listened to that guy when he said stuff like “hey, Roosevelt (and other State Department guys) this Hitler character seems like bad news.”  I recommend this book to Granddads everywhere, and also to people who like books about presidents, history, etc.  It was a little dry for my taste.  Larsen would end chapters with what seemed like important cliff hangers, but which really didn’t become part of the specific story about Ambassador Dodd – they were just hints that WWII was coming, which I pretty much already knew (see every third entry in this blog for reference.)

I preferred the only other book of Larson’s that I have read, which was the oh-so-popular-especially-because-I-lived-in-Chicago-when-it-came-out The Devil in the White City.  That book had two story lines happening at once, another jolly read about a real serial killer and the 1893 Chicago World’s Fair.  (Fun fact: it was during this World’s Fair that Pabst won that Blue Ribbon they are still bragging about.)

Despite the accounts I read of the State Department and the rampant anti-Semitism even in the US in the ‘30s, I was still proud to live in the good ol’ US of A this weekend while lounging on a dock with the American flag flapping.  I can always rely on my favorite patriot – Samuel Adams and his delicious Cherry Wheat beer.

Playing River Wiffle Ball at Sunset While Loving America.  Photo credit: Wonderful Katherine.

Blogger Admits to Trashy Reading & Love of Wrap Dresses

As I’ve mentioned, I am in the middle of a pretty heavy read right now.  And not just because it is a hardcover book (cue bad comedian drum beat).  So I was fortunate to borrow some very light reading from a Friend Who Does Not Read This Blog and Makes Fun of It Quite a Bit.

The biggest family secret
 is the total lack of secrets.

That’s right, I have devolved into writing about magazines.  I don’t normally read a lot of magazines, at least since my subscription to Seventeen ended well after I was too old to still read it and most girls had switched to Cosmo.  But I just can’t resist reading about the Duchess of Cambridge and admiring her wrap dresses.  This issue was all about the deep dark secrets of the Middleton family, and after much research from unnamed sources, it was determined that there aren’t any!  Quite a fulfilling read – I should pick up magazines more often.

Two Unrelated Items; One Blog Posting

Item #1:  I saw Bridesmaids this weekend with one of my bridesmaids (and Blog Reader, more importantly).  That movie is hilarious.  It was directed by Paul Feig, whose book I gave a rave review on this very blog.  That guy is on fire – I don’t think he even needs promotion from this blog.  In fact, I bet he doesn’t even remember writing Kick Me at this point.



My bridesmaids & me.



Item #2: Longtime Non-Reader and Anonymous Blog Fan Lane Yates bought her first book The Help by Kathryn Stockett.  I am going to take 100% credit for this, despite possibly losing her friendship by posting her name on this increasingly popular book blog.

Does posting a picture of Anonymous Blog Fan at her wedding tie these two posts together?  Eh, not really.  But I bet Paul Feig could have figured out how to do it.



Anonymous Reader marries.  Later goes on to purchase first book.



Readership Gets Increasingly Demanding of Beloved Bookworm

My #1 Blog Reader (other than my Mom) was in town to visit this weekend, and gave me some constructive blog criticism which I readily accepted.  After the scathing reviews I have been known to give books, I should be able to take a little advice as well.  Sure, I don’t expect people to pay $13.95 to read this in paperback or $24.95 for the hardback edition but I am still committed to my no longer plummeting(!) readership.

Someone Who Doesn't Have a Blog But Is Full of Advice & World's Best Dog Norman

Her advice: more pictures.  Therefore included in today’s blog is a photo of #1 Blog Reader and World’s Best Dog Norman.  I am taking this advice seriously, and not pushing back with arguments like “reading is not exactly a photogenic activity” or “where’s your blog, Mrs. Perfect”?  That’s just not my style.

Back to reading.  Here are the three books I lent to #1 Reader, since she always gives them back to me when she is finished:

·         Round Ireland with a Fridge by Tony Hawks.  This is rapidly becoming one of my lent books and you are probably sick of hearing me write about it, loyal readers.

·         Empress Orchid by Anchee Min.  I think this book was based on the true story of a girl who went from poverty to the Empress of China.  I like books about Asian royalty – the opulence, interesting traditions and creepy food are fascinating.

·         On Hitler's Mountain: Overcoming the Legacy of a Nazi Childhood by Irmgard A. Hunt.  You know I love a good memoir.  This one is about a girl whose parents were Nazis and she was brought up on the mountain where Hitler’s headquarters were located.  Very interesting (and true) story.

#1 Blog Reader, I hope you enjoy these books. Even though there aren’t pictures in them.

Flying Private = Bonding Time with Co-Workers & Jim Beam

Private planes likely make you think of caviar, champagne, and Fergie singing “G-L-A-M-O-R-O-U-S.”  It makes me think of cold chicken fingers and not reading.

This week I flew to Philadelphia for the day with colleagues to visit clients.  This is notable because it is the only flying situation I can think of when I don’t even bring a book.  You read that right.  Flying private means NO airport security lines, NO waiting and NO leg room (the first two items being more notable).  As I sat knee-to-knee across from a Co-Worker Who Has Never Heard Of This Blog, I realized how awkward it would be to pull out a big honkin’ novel and dive in.  No way, let’s talk about business stuff.

Flying private sounds glamorous thanks to Fergie Ferg, and it is from a convenience stand point.  But when you are actually in that tuna can in the sky eating snacks that are better served hot and playing footsie with your co-workers it’s really more funny than anything.  Especially after two plastic bottles of Jim Beam.

Warning: Robust Posting About Books Ahead; Seriously Guys a Lot of Bookish Stuff Written Here

Here’s the thing – sometimes I like to read a really big fat book.  A deep dive into the characters and story that you just lose yourself in and get to enjoy for a long time.  This doesn’t bode well for a full time employee that also maintains a book blog.  That’s the place I am in now.  So, to buy myself some time I am making an Unofficial List of Big Thick Books That I Like.  Among my favorites are:

·         The Winds of War by Herman Wouk – this book is freaking awesome, as is the equally big fat sequel War & Remembrance.  It tells the story of World War II through the life of an American family who ends up involved in the most historic parts of the war (sort of the way Forrest Gump did, but without the humor).  I wish I knew more adjectives that meant “awesome” because this is one of the best books ever.  It was written in the 70s, and it was actually given to me by a director of a commercial I was working on.  He heard I liked reading and in particular WW2 memoirs, and figured I would like this fictitious series.  That guy was dead right. 

·         Gone With the Wind by Margaret Mitchell.  I read this book in the fifth grade, and want to read it again one day since it is so good.  The longer, more in-depth story that the book tells is better than the movie, which I know is an annoying observation.  Scarlett, the Sequel to Margaret Mitchell’s Gone with the Wind by Alexandra Ripley was also long, but not memorable.

·         Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett and the sequel World Without End – what’s with all of these super long books having sequels?  Each of these are a thousand pages, which clearly is not enough for these fantastically verbose authors.  But I digress.  I love this book and almost everything written by Follett.  This book in particular is such a carefully crafted story with wonderful characters that you want to either hug or punch.  It was written in the 80s but re-popularized by Oprah when it made her Book Club right before the sequel was released.  (Notable aside:  Kitty Kelley’s book Oprah almost fits into the Big Thick Book Category and is a great read as well.  That chick was naughty!)  

·         The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged – both by Ayn Rand.  Rand is an extremist, though I like her point of view on the most basic level: Do your best at what you are good at;  Let others do the same without restriction.  Politics aside, the woman is a killer storyteller.  Sure, some of the speeches go on a bit long, but well worth the read.  I have read all of her books and wish she had written more, but these two are certainly the most famous and wonderful.  They are two separate stories, not sequential like my first three bullets.

·         Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy – just kidding.  This book was long and depressing as hell, but I feel like I deserve some credit for reading it to completion and not throwing myself in front of a train.

Ironically my reviews of Big Thick Books have gone on far too long.  Therefore I am assured a thumbs down review from Reluctant Readers Husband and Brother, who most likely won’t make it through this post.  Joke’s on them – I am recommending Anna Karenina to those guys for their annual reads.

Blogger’s Sense of Accomplishment Likely Short Lived

I have finished all three books in the Hunger Games series now.  Predictably, I liked the first book best, then the second book, and rounding out the series in last place is Mockingjay by Suzanne Collins.  Once the books became about political intrigue in this bizarre country called Panem, I was much less interested.  Overall, I am glad I pushed through and read the whole series – I would be kind of a joke as a blogger if I didn’t.  Just kidding, I am a joke as a blogger already.

Reading Mockingjay beneath freshly hung painting by talented mother-in-law

Epic Sunday Walk Results in Snoozing Dog & Breaking Book News

Two things happened on my Super Sized Sunday Walk with World’s Best Dog Norman:



<>

Worn Out Dog Post-Walk



1.       Ladies fawned over my little mutt and suggested that we breed Normans.  This is often suggested, but is unfortunately a scientific impossibility.  What I should do is hire Norman out to stroll the ‘hood with single guys looking to meet ladyfriends.

2.       I saw that my neighborhood library is closed for renovations.  This is an exciting development in the Life of a Bookworm.



I have always been a big library user, which stemmed from my parents requiring us to visit the bookmobile when it came to our neighborhood every Tuesday.  That plan could have backfired big time, but somehow it didn’t.  Even my brother makes an effort to read a book each and every year.

When I lived in Chicago, I was a frequent visitor to the Lincoln Park Public Library, even though I lived one block from a big, beautiful multi-level Borders where I did more damage than my salary really could handle.  But since I have lived in Richmond, I have only been to my neighborhood library once – to get a library card.  There was nothing appealing about the place, which it looks like they have noticed. 

The website doesn’t say when the renovations will be finished AND their blog has no entries – off to a rough start, Belmont.

The Belmont Branch Library misses the 70s.



Audience Demands Reading Amidst Difficult Conditions; Blogger Grovels As Usual

I got a little bit of heat yesterday from my now famous Anonymous Friend Who is a Blog Reader But Not a Book Reader for not having posted since Monday.  So last night when my power shut off for 2 minutes, I was glad I didn’t have to put my glowing iPad down – I could resume reading on my Nook app.  There’s a product benefit you never hear in commercials.

In closing, please don’t give up on my blog.  I am reading as fast as I can, and think each of you are smart, pretty and interesting – whichever of those compliments is most relevant.

Bookworm Writes Thesis; Spends Upwards of 10 Minutes

At a party on Saturday Night, Friend and At Least One Time Reader But Maybe More? Kristen was telling me that she is reading The Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe.  I was immediately jealous.  I wish I was reading that book right now, but I have already read it so I don’t have the pleasure of enjoying it for the first time.  This is an inefficient and poorly written way of saying that I love that book.

Tom Wolfe writes two kinds of books – those I can stand (and by “stand” I mean “love”), and those I cannot stand.  Here is how they break down:

·         The Bonfire of the Vanities – excellent

·         A Man in Full – boy was that great

·         I Am Charlotte Simmons – keep ‘em coming, Tom

·         The Right Stuff – wait, really? 

·         Hooking Up – terrible

I’d like to think that this is one of the more comprehensive reviews of famed writer (and Richmond native) Tom Wolfe’s work.  I expect that the New York Times will be clamoring to get me on staff as a reviewer after this post, or that UVA will be eager to give me an honorary doctorate after seeing such an insightful thesis.  Both of these items can be offered via blog comments.

Mom / Breakfast Meats / Reading / Please Become a Follower, Natalie

In honor of Mothers Day, I stuffed myself silly like any good daughter.  What better way to celebrate my Beloved Mom than going to my Grandparents’ country club and eating an omelet, an obscene portion of breakfast meats, fruit, a salad and for dessert – pasta in tomato cream sauce.  Not only did I celebrate my Mom by eating a huge brunch, but she then returned the favor and sent me home with a BBQ dinner ready to go.  The woman knows how to show love through the all important stomach.

Which brings me to my latest read, book two in the Hunger Games series – Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins.  I can already see that I could be making my infamous Twilight mistake by reading these all at once, but once I commit to a book series I am all in.  I still like this series, and boy are they quick reads.  Ideal for a blogger with a full time job and drinking schedule to attend to.

To make this even more interesting for my readership, I borrowed this book via the Nook from my Friend and Occasional Reader Who Hasn’t Signed Up As a Follower But That’s Okay Natalie.  It was very easy to accept the eBook, but you only have 14 days to finish it.  Of course I finished it in about four, but not everyone has the pressures of blog readership to keep them going.  An excuse I wish I could also apply to the amount of pork products I consumed this afternoon.

Blogger Risks Outrage From Flagging Readership; Bravery Likely To Go Unnoticed

Since I am in the midst of enjoying a series of books written for teenagers (no, not The Babysitters Club), I’d like to set the record straight on something… controversial.  I don’t think my likely plummeting readership rate can really handle this, but I am going to say it anyway.

I hate Twilight.

Like a teenager, I read all of the books because of peer pressure.  All the girls at work were raving about these books and I thought to myself “I like books!” so I thought I would be cool and read them too.  Backfire.

I read all four (or are there 3?) in a row, which was probably my first mistake.  Boy are they repetitive.  Look Best Selling Author Whose First Name Is Spelled Wrong Stephenie Meyer, we understand that Edward is hot and his skin shines like diamonds.  You write about it for hundreds of pages in this freaking series.  It sounds gross to me, but I get the point and I would bet that the 12 year olds do too.

If I were a more analytical blogger, I’d probably dive into the similarities between our tomboy heroes Bella (Twilight) and Katniss (The Hunger Games).  But out of respect for what is left of my readership I will leave analysis to the 8th graders and stick to my core competency – snide remarks.

Bookworm Reads Like a Teenager; Maintains Job & Beer Drinking Schedule

I read The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins in less than 48 hours.  And mind you, this is while working full time and even having a friend over one night to kick back a few beers on the patio.  (Yes, it was on a Monday.)

This book was apparently written for teenagers, which makes me want to get braces and be an awkward teen again.  (Ok, that was a convenient analogy.  The Bookworm never had braces, but you get my point.)  The Hunger Games is awesome, and (obviously) a quick and exciting read.  I am late in my ravings, since it is already being made into a movie, and Blog Readers Natalie and Erin have recommended this book to me multiple times.  Key lesson: listen to friends who love books.

The other night my Mom told me all the books I was lending her were depressing.  So I told her The Hunger Games was next on the list.  “It’s about kids killing other kids for food!”  Somehow that didn’t sell her. I guess if she wants to go back to teen reading it will have to be Judy Blume.  Or in her case, Nancy Drew.

There’s Nothing Funny About the Holocaust

Much like my Mom’s now famous advice “don’t wait until you need a dress to buy a dress” I feel the same way about stocking my Not As Famous As It Wants To Be To Read pile.  (Sponsorship still available, prices plummeting.)  Nothing’s worse than the dreaded airport bookstore, where you are forced to pay full price for a hardcover book you could have gotten as a paperback at the used bookstore.

(Notable exception: I purchased A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini LAX and it was: 1. A wonderful read and makes My Ultimate Favorites List 2. Worth every seemingly-overpriced penny for the hardback book.  Best cross-country coach flight ever.)

So today I invested in my future by using up the last few dollars from my Christmas Barnes & Noble haul and bought a couple of books there, as well as another promising read on half.com.  When I went to checkout, I wondered if I was the only person out there on a shopping spree that includes both a memoir from the Holocaust and another from a comedian.  An unusual combination sure, but I have a feeling that after reading the former I will be in need of reading the latter. 

Don’t judge me Barnes & Noble.  You and your overly frequent minute-by-minute shipping updates.  Paperback Bookworm© Blog sponsorships available.

Employee of the Month Award Already Not Likely; Only Third Day of Month

Yesterday was just too beautiful to be in a cubicle.  Lucky for me, our second floor air conditioner needed its annual dose of Freon (I don’t know what that is but I have a feeling it is poison for the planet) so I got to slip home midday to let a man climb onto my roof.  And since it was a rare slow day at work, I sat outside with my laptop, Blackberry, a book and my trusty guard dog who was in no mood to have strange men crawling on his house.

Susan works diligently; I photograph

Let’s just say that reading a chapter of an awesome book in the middle of a gorgeous day destroys a productive afternoon. I was so engrossed that I didn’t eat enough lunch which also contributed to my downward spiral.  After 2 months of relentless workload, letting me breathe for an afternoon may be a mistake, trusty employer.  Going back to the office was not easy.  Thank goodness for the third floor patio and Trusty Co-Worker and Unlikely Blog Reader Susan.

You may be asking yourself, is it a wise choice professionally to comment on a less than perfect employee day? To quote my friend Katherine when speaking of my blog “Thank God nobody reads that thing!”

Bookworm’s Lack of Culinary Skills Repeatedly Mentioned for Some Reason

March by Geraldine Brooks had a recipe for success.  I loved two of Brooks’ other books (People of the Book and Year of Wonders).  Plus, this book was the back story of Mr. March, the father in one of my favorite childhood books Little Women.  Oh how I loved that book, and Louisa May Alcott’s follow-ups Little Men and Jo's Boys.

But like most of my recipes, this didn’t quite turn out as expected.  I mean, I really enjoyed the book, but I think my expectations were too high.  Again, like my cooking.  I though this was going to be the best book ever – or I guess to maintain the analogy the best casserole ever cooked ? – but it was just a good, solid B+.  Which ain’t bad. 

And some of my cooking is really, really bad.