I’m Sorry Jenny, Your Books Are Too Smart For Me

I read 104 pages of Chuck Klosterman’s Sex, Drugs and Cocoa Puffs and still have no idea what it is about.  I understand he is talking about pop culture in a sarcastic way which I appreciate, but he is being a bit overly academic for my taste.  And damn has that guy watched a lot of TV.  He openly admitted to seeing every episode of The Real World “at least” three times.  If this guy wasn’t busy writing books that make me feel like an idiot I would feel sorry for him.

This book feels like a cross between a BS liberal arts class (I can say that – I have a liberal arts degree) and People Magazine.  I can really only follow the People parts, and am going to swallow my pride and put this in the “return to friend who clearly thinks I am smarter than I am” pile.  Sadly, there are at least two books there.  For the record, there are zero books in the “I’m too smart for this crap!” pile.

Ok, NOW You've Seen Everything

Apparently carrying a clutch that looks like a book is a trend.  As someone who adores both books and dresses, I think these beautiful ladies all look ridiculous.  I also can't help but wonder which titles are available as purses.  I would want a book called Just Holding This Wallet or The Clever Tampon Holder.


Source: people.com



Even A Computer Can Predict Books I Like

Amazon, you get me.  After analyzing my selections, amazon.com recommended an awesome book to me, so I give full credit to whoever made the formula that figured that one out.  Probably someone who knows how to use Excel.

Little Bee by Chris Cleave is a really good book.  It’s got some of my go-to good book ingredients – sad, inspirational, poor people – but told in a whole new way.  It’s not a true story, but I still felt smarter after I read it.  I in no way deserve to feel smarter, especially given my miserable lack of Excel skills.

I am probably overstating Amazon’s genius on this one since it is a New York Times Bestseller with over a million copies in print.  But it was new to me, and I can’t wait to put it on my lending list – ladies, you know who you are.



Mom: best known as first on the book lender list
and for her turkey sausage stuffed shells.



Oddly, a Rather Informative Posting

I am a Bookworm of many interests.  My Twitter profile lists these as books, dresses, dinner, travel and beer.  I’d say that sums me up pretty well.

My favorite form of eating is anything cooked by Bookworm Senior, my Mom.  But when that fails, I like food cooked by anyone else.  In the direst of occasions, I cook for myself.  Such was the case this week on family vacation.

On vacation in the Outer Banks, the family policy is simple.  Everyone cooks one night, and provides music during dinner.  This year, we added a signature drink as well.  I didn’t know this curveball was coming, but fortunately never plan a dinner without thinking through the beverage so I was prepared anyway.  (Phew.)

As for the meal, of course I turned to a book.  This book was given to us by Andrew’s parents the year they gave us a grill.  We’ve had great luck with Better Homes and Gardens® New Grilling Book.  The meal didn’t kill anybody, so I consider it a great success.  Our meal included:

·         Steak with avocado sauce

·         Asparagus with dill (dill grown in the garden)

·         Caprese salad (arugula and basil grown in the garden)

·         Italian bread (purchased – don’t judge me)

·         Firefly Lemon (add water and ice – boom!  Family giggles ensue)

Then my Mom stole the show by making her pineapple margarita cupcakes.  Interestingly, cooking skills are not hereditary.

Here is how to make the avocado sauce:

Ingredients

8 ounces fresh tomatillos, husked and quartered (6 medium)

2 ounces cream cheese

1 avocado, halved, seeded, peeled and cut up

¼ cup green onions (2)

½ teaspoon salt

In a small saucepan, bring tomatillos and water to boiling; reduce heat.  Cover and simmer for 5-7 minutes or until tomatillos are soft.  Drain.  Stir in cream cheese until melted; cool mixture slightly.  In a food processor or blender combine tomatillo mixture, avocado, sliced green onions and salt.  Cover and blend until smooth.  Transfer sauce into serving bowl. 

Recipe says it makes 4-6 servings, but I easily served 10 people and had leftovers.  It’s plenty of sauce since it is ultra-flavorful.  Enjoy!

Laziness That Will Astound You & Maybe Even Impress A Couple Of You

I am one lazy Bookworm. This week I have found myself struggling to do things like switch from sitting in a chair to laying down, getting up to fetch a beer from the cooler 2 feet away, and yes even updating my beloved blog. I aim to right all three of these wrongs today by tanning my back, drinking tons of beers and of course this blog entry. Please appreciate my Go Get 'Em Attitude.

One thing that takes very little effort is finishing a good book like The Concubine's Children by Denise Chong. I did this during my aforementioned sitting down, which occurred on the beach in Corolla, NC. By now you know that I love a good sob story, and for some reason read about China on vacation. (Please see fancy new "Popular Posts" section on the right for reference.). This book checks both boxes, though it didn't make me cry so much as angry at bad parenting, which is a subset I enjoy within the broader "sob story" category. Plus, it has the added bonus of being a true story, so it's good to know that this hard drinking pretty slutty concubine was the real deal. She could be President and CEO of The Bad Girls if that exclusive club was also into child neglect, which it is not.

I am contemplating a switch from sitting to standing, and will therefore leave this post a cliffhanger. Will she stand? The world may never know.

You'll Never Get This Two Minutes Back, Reader

I just ignored 3 meeting invites. That's right people - I'm on vacation.

Our drive down yesterday was a literary adventure. Due to technical difficulties, we drove the first hour without an audiobook to secure family peace and cooperation. Luckily this bookworm "discovered" the game of Scrabble I had downloaded to my iPad months ago.

In Andrew's world, the only thing worse than playing Scrabble is listening to the narrative of me Playing Scrabble. (Though for the record, my first play was S-H-U-T-T-L-E. That's 7 letters for a whopping 76 points. With stories like this I should have a million followers and win any available Wife Of The Year awards.)

So Andrew promptly tried not one but two gas stations to get us a set of earbuds we could share and listen to our soft spoken narrator. (Who I know would be impressed with my Scrabble prowess!)

Note to friends: if I ever comment on any dips in blog audience, please remind me of the soon-to-be-infamous "Scrabble Posting." I think we can all agree that a new low has been reached. My book editor has quite the task ahead!

Bookworm Clings Desperately to Funnier, More Popular Blog

If there is anything I know from working in advertising, it’s that sometimes the agency needs to start an assignment before being officially briefed.  In some cases, the work can get approved faster than the assignment itself.  Such is the case with getting my official assignment from The Bad Girl for a summer read.

Bad Girl recommended the Lovetini at Osaka
to Bookworm in 2010.  Bookworm promptly
 ordered another beer.

Knowing what I do about the Bad Girl Lifestyle, which includes poolside relaxation by day and vodka in any form by night, I am confident in my summer book recommendation.  Please read Are You There Vodka? It’s Me, Chelsea by Chelsea Handler.  This book is hilarious in the cover-your-face-with-embarrassment brand, and perfect for the single girl lifestyle.  While I don’t recommend following the ways of Handler (who is still single), I do think that laughing at her antics will inspire the poolside lounger to get back on the horn at Banditos as nighttime approaches.

Bad girl, please complete this assignment and follow up with a recap.