Bookworm Writes Thesis; Spends Upwards of 10 Minutes

At a party on Saturday Night, Friend and At Least One Time Reader But Maybe More? Kristen was telling me that she is reading The Bonfire of the Vanities by Tom Wolfe.  I was immediately jealous.  I wish I was reading that book right now, but I have already read it so I don’t have the pleasure of enjoying it for the first time.  This is an inefficient and poorly written way of saying that I love that book.

Tom Wolfe writes two kinds of books – those I can stand (and by “stand” I mean “love”), and those I cannot stand.  Here is how they break down:

·         The Bonfire of the Vanities – excellent

·         A Man in Full – boy was that great

·         I Am Charlotte Simmons – keep ‘em coming, Tom

·         The Right Stuff – wait, really? 

·         Hooking Up – terrible

I’d like to think that this is one of the more comprehensive reviews of famed writer (and Richmond native) Tom Wolfe’s work.  I expect that the New York Times will be clamoring to get me on staff as a reviewer after this post, or that UVA will be eager to give me an honorary doctorate after seeing such an insightful thesis.  Both of these items can be offered via blog comments.

Mom / Breakfast Meats / Reading / Please Become a Follower, Natalie

In honor of Mothers Day, I stuffed myself silly like any good daughter.  What better way to celebrate my Beloved Mom than going to my Grandparents’ country club and eating an omelet, an obscene portion of breakfast meats, fruit, a salad and for dessert – pasta in tomato cream sauce.  Not only did I celebrate my Mom by eating a huge brunch, but she then returned the favor and sent me home with a BBQ dinner ready to go.  The woman knows how to show love through the all important stomach.

Which brings me to my latest read, book two in the Hunger Games series – Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins.  I can already see that I could be making my infamous Twilight mistake by reading these all at once, but once I commit to a book series I am all in.  I still like this series, and boy are they quick reads.  Ideal for a blogger with a full time job and drinking schedule to attend to.

To make this even more interesting for my readership, I borrowed this book via the Nook from my Friend and Occasional Reader Who Hasn’t Signed Up As a Follower But That’s Okay Natalie.  It was very easy to accept the eBook, but you only have 14 days to finish it.  Of course I finished it in about four, but not everyone has the pressures of blog readership to keep them going.  An excuse I wish I could also apply to the amount of pork products I consumed this afternoon.

Blogger Risks Outrage From Flagging Readership; Bravery Likely To Go Unnoticed

Since I am in the midst of enjoying a series of books written for teenagers (no, not The Babysitters Club), I’d like to set the record straight on something… controversial.  I don’t think my likely plummeting readership rate can really handle this, but I am going to say it anyway.

I hate Twilight.

Like a teenager, I read all of the books because of peer pressure.  All the girls at work were raving about these books and I thought to myself “I like books!” so I thought I would be cool and read them too.  Backfire.

I read all four (or are there 3?) in a row, which was probably my first mistake.  Boy are they repetitive.  Look Best Selling Author Whose First Name Is Spelled Wrong Stephenie Meyer, we understand that Edward is hot and his skin shines like diamonds.  You write about it for hundreds of pages in this freaking series.  It sounds gross to me, but I get the point and I would bet that the 12 year olds do too.

If I were a more analytical blogger, I’d probably dive into the similarities between our tomboy heroes Bella (Twilight) and Katniss (The Hunger Games).  But out of respect for what is left of my readership I will leave analysis to the 8th graders and stick to my core competency – snide remarks.

Bookworm Reads Like a Teenager; Maintains Job & Beer Drinking Schedule

I read The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins in less than 48 hours.  And mind you, this is while working full time and even having a friend over one night to kick back a few beers on the patio.  (Yes, it was on a Monday.)

This book was apparently written for teenagers, which makes me want to get braces and be an awkward teen again.  (Ok, that was a convenient analogy.  The Bookworm never had braces, but you get my point.)  The Hunger Games is awesome, and (obviously) a quick and exciting read.  I am late in my ravings, since it is already being made into a movie, and Blog Readers Natalie and Erin have recommended this book to me multiple times.  Key lesson: listen to friends who love books.

The other night my Mom told me all the books I was lending her were depressing.  So I told her The Hunger Games was next on the list.  “It’s about kids killing other kids for food!”  Somehow that didn’t sell her. I guess if she wants to go back to teen reading it will have to be Judy Blume.  Or in her case, Nancy Drew.

There’s Nothing Funny About the Holocaust

Much like my Mom’s now famous advice “don’t wait until you need a dress to buy a dress” I feel the same way about stocking my Not As Famous As It Wants To Be To Read pile.  (Sponsorship still available, prices plummeting.)  Nothing’s worse than the dreaded airport bookstore, where you are forced to pay full price for a hardcover book you could have gotten as a paperback at the used bookstore.

(Notable exception: I purchased A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini LAX and it was: 1. A wonderful read and makes My Ultimate Favorites List 2. Worth every seemingly-overpriced penny for the hardback book.  Best cross-country coach flight ever.)

So today I invested in my future by using up the last few dollars from my Christmas Barnes & Noble haul and bought a couple of books there, as well as another promising read on half.com.  When I went to checkout, I wondered if I was the only person out there on a shopping spree that includes both a memoir from the Holocaust and another from a comedian.  An unusual combination sure, but I have a feeling that after reading the former I will be in need of reading the latter. 

Don’t judge me Barnes & Noble.  You and your overly frequent minute-by-minute shipping updates.  Paperback Bookworm© Blog sponsorships available.

Employee of the Month Award Already Not Likely; Only Third Day of Month

Yesterday was just too beautiful to be in a cubicle.  Lucky for me, our second floor air conditioner needed its annual dose of Freon (I don’t know what that is but I have a feeling it is poison for the planet) so I got to slip home midday to let a man climb onto my roof.  And since it was a rare slow day at work, I sat outside with my laptop, Blackberry, a book and my trusty guard dog who was in no mood to have strange men crawling on his house.

Susan works diligently; I photograph

Let’s just say that reading a chapter of an awesome book in the middle of a gorgeous day destroys a productive afternoon. I was so engrossed that I didn’t eat enough lunch which also contributed to my downward spiral.  After 2 months of relentless workload, letting me breathe for an afternoon may be a mistake, trusty employer.  Going back to the office was not easy.  Thank goodness for the third floor patio and Trusty Co-Worker and Unlikely Blog Reader Susan.

You may be asking yourself, is it a wise choice professionally to comment on a less than perfect employee day? To quote my friend Katherine when speaking of my blog “Thank God nobody reads that thing!”

Bookworm’s Lack of Culinary Skills Repeatedly Mentioned for Some Reason

March by Geraldine Brooks had a recipe for success.  I loved two of Brooks’ other books (People of the Book and Year of Wonders).  Plus, this book was the back story of Mr. March, the father in one of my favorite childhood books Little Women.  Oh how I loved that book, and Louisa May Alcott’s follow-ups Little Men and Jo's Boys.

But like most of my recipes, this didn’t quite turn out as expected.  I mean, I really enjoyed the book, but I think my expectations were too high.  Again, like my cooking.  I though this was going to be the best book ever – or I guess to maintain the analogy the best casserole ever cooked ? – but it was just a good, solid B+.  Which ain’t bad. 

And some of my cooking is really, really bad.