The Key With Kids Is To Give Winding Unclear and Wordy Direction, As Seen Here

Has anyone noticed that there has been, on average, one more audiobook than usual available for download from the Richmond Public Library?  That’s because I took a little hiatus from listening to books in exchange for napping.  But I’m back, as I have found audiobook listening to be a perfect activity to pair with nesting, the act of a mother-to-be looking at cute baby stuff on Pinterest.  In olden times, this term was used to refer to cleaning and organizing.  Silly pioneer women!

Ok, so about this week’s audiobook.  Several people – but most notably Top Blog Reader Kiley – have been surprised for years that I have never read the Harry Potter books.  I have never been interested in the Fantasy genre (and have lived to regret my brief foray into the Twilight series).  But when I saw that Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone by J.K. Rowling was available to download, I thought I’d give it a listen.  I’d love to add 500 books to my To Read Pile.  (That’s how many are in the series, right?)

Turns out, I don’t care about wizards going to wizardry school and their dumb wizard problems.  This book was completely uninteresting.  I mean, wow.  I can’t believe how much people (mainly 10 year olds, Kiley) love this stuff.  I’d like to recommend they check out the Little House on the Prairie series by Laura Ingalls Wilder.  Wow, is that good stuff.  And based on true stories of suffering and overcoming hardship, which every kid should want to learn about.  At one point they lived in a hill! (On the Banks of Plum Creek, Book 4 in the series)  For Christmas they got a peppermint stick! (every single one of the books)  And, perhaps even more sad – no Pinterest.  How did they decorate their dirt walls?

Ok, ok I think kids reading books is good no matter what wizardry crap they are into.  I remember reading some (perhaps 100) pretty useless books about silly babysitters and their little babysitter problems.   And now I run a completely unsuccessful blog about reading books.  Aim high, kiddos!

Bookworm Confession: A Damn Big One (Note to Self: Stop Swearing Soon)

Dearest Readership, I have a confession to make – I have been reading behind your backs.  Yes, it’s true.  Here is my current reading list in different stages of completion:

Baby Care Book came
from Mother-in-Law
in cutest wrapping paper ever

•        What to Expect When You're Expecting by Heidi Murkoff and Sharon Mazel (cheesy, but informative)
•        Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy (I am practically a doctor now)
•        The Baby Care Book: A Complete Guide from Birth to 12 Months Old by Dr. Jeremy Friedman and Dr. Norman Saunders (still relatively clueless about how to keep a baby alive) 

That’s right, The Bookworm is having a Baby Bookworm in January 2013.  More immediately, The Bookworm (henceforth referred to as “I”) is taking lots of naps during ideal reading opportunities.

One of Loyal Blog Follower Katherine’s first questions upon hearing the news (notably followed by a relatively horrified “on PURPOSE?!?!”) was about whether this blog would turn into a “Mom Blog.”  This was asked with a certain level of distaste.  No need to worry, this blog is committed to books and vaguely book-related topics.  Mom Blogs have such a wide audience, I worry about becoming too popular and over-exposed.  This underground blog allows me to continue my “normal” lifestyle and I wouldn’t have it any other way.

To maintain normalcy, Blog Reader Susan suggested I continue to
post gratuitous pictures of World's Best Dog Norman.

You Can Go Back to Watching the Olympics in Just a Sec

The Summer Olympics are severely stunting my reading time in the evenings.  Andrew can’t understand my fascination with gymnastics, diving, beach volleyball and other girly sports I only watch once every four years. I feel like Blog Reader and America Lover Natalie when I tear up at the 2 minute canned story about the Olympian’s sacrifice, followed by American Sport Domination over The Evil Chinese/Russians/Lithuanians/Jamaicans/Whoever.  Good stuff.

Speaking of Synchornized Diving (were we?) please find the very bizarre blog sent to me by Friend Who Has Maybe Heard Of This Blog Nick.  For some reason this blogger finds bathing suits that remind him/her of book covers and then posts them.  I do not know why.  I’m guessing that it’s mostly because people love Finding Crap on the Internet more than they love reading their emails and attending required meetings.  I fall pretty solidly into that camp, too.

I’ve posted unnecessary pics of myself in a bikini while reading, so I guess this makes just as much sense.  So, enjoy.

I like everything that is happening here.
The book, shorts and pecs are all working.

Good book, better bikini.

Liked this book, medium on the bikini, still confused overall.

Harsh Review is Potentially Unnecessary, But What the Hell I Will Just Post It Since Like 5 of My Friends and My Mom Might Check This

In Zanesville: A Novel  by Jo Ann Beard is not a good book.  It’s labeled as a “coming of age novel” which I think authors put on the back of books to make you think of The Catcher in the Rye.  Then they write at least one paragraph about girls getting periods and they think they are done.

In this book, nothing happens.  It’s as if the author literally followed a teenage girl around for a few weeks and just documented it – no real reason for a beginning, middle or end.  None of that traditional plot climax stuff here, folks.

I did like one sentence in the book on page 208 in case you just want to read that.  The main characters thinks to herself “This is the worst day of my life.  Unless you count yesterday.”  I probably thought that 1,000 times when I was in high school, likely related to problems like hating all my sneakers or having to take Geometry.

Luckily I read this crappy book while reading on a beach with friends, and generally getting pretty spoiled by my Mom.  So, grumpy teenager reading couldn’t make me but so grumpy.

Mom wins Mom Points via baking.
Individual peach and blueberry cobblers for everyone.
Yes, seriously.

Airport Complaining Narrowly Avoided; Passive Aggressive Stance Taken

Whenever I think of Gypsy Boy: My Life in the Secret World of the Romany Gypsies I think of the abysmal service of US Airways, a topic I am trying to consciously avoid on this blog.  Plus, that isn’t really fair to autobiographer Mikey Walsh who went through a lot to escape his past, learn to read and write and then go on to draft a book.  So I will try to separate my miserable travel to and from Philadelphia this week from the time I spent enjoying this sad story.  Honestly this book and the hopes of a Philly cheesesteak with Loyal Blog Reader Kiley are the only things that got me through.

I have been curious about Gypsies ever since my mom dragged into the underworld that is My Big Fat Gypsy Wedding on the hit-producing network TLC.  I think the white trash folks featured on that show are the Irish Gypsies, who apparently copied the Romany Gypsy lifestyle of being a “traveller.”  This translates into living in trailers, rejecting education, and having the absolute worst and trashiest taste in everything.  Who wouldn’t want to copy that lifestyle?

Poor Walsh was a misfit for this crew from the start, and though he was close to his Mom, I think she should have protected him more than she did.  This story was sad, but ultimately inspiring since Walsh escaped and managed to live his life the way he wanted to.

The Best Thing That Ever Happened to this Blog Happened Today

This morning I got a monumental email.  (Mom, it wasn’t the one you sent me about a new mattress, but thanks for that.)

I have copied and pasted it here in its un-lying and totally true entirety – I am star struck.

I wanted to comment on your blog site but the darn thing wouldn't accept my URL. I also am not certain of your name, so please forgive the no-heading.

I just wanted to thank you for your great review! Thank you! I am so happy that you enjoyed the book. :)

A big hug from Forest, Virginia.

Kathleen (Grissom)

Yes, this actually happened.  I love that my new friend Kathleen got a dig in at the crappy site blogspot, and that we agree that it sucks.  I am pretty sure there is an undertone here of respect for our mutual art of writing.

Kathleen, I am Allison.  Let’s get together sometime – perhaps with Ken Follett if he is available?– and talk about smart literary stuff. 

My day can and will go downhill from here.

Bookworm Raves & Continues To Love List Making

The Kitchen House by Kathleen Grissom is an awesome, awesome book and easily one of the best I have read in a long time.  In fact I am putting it on the top of my largely ignored Current Favorites List here on the right of your screen.  Yes, it was worth spending several seconds remembering how to do that.

Why is this book so awesome, no one asks?  I’ll tell you:

1.  You get into it immediately.  Within 10 pages I knew I loved this book and was going to race through it to lend it to my Mom, since I will see her in a couple of weeks.

2.  Super sad, complex, fast moving, historical story.  It is fictional, but felt so real.

3. The story takes place in Virginia, including several chapters in Williamsburg.  I knew some of the streets and historical sites referenced very well, though my favorite place remains The Cheese Shop, which probably wasn’t there in 1791.

This is the kind of book that makes me love being a reader.  Crappy television like Andrew’s favorite Gardening By The Yard has the same effect but with more eye rolling.